My life is big, and full. While I feel like I have been following God's leading in making it so, there are certainly choices along the way. We chose to adopt Nicholas, and wow, what an amazing gift he has been. God smoothed the process from start to finish, He brought him through a precarious pregnancy with no prenatal care, drugs, and who knows what else, He brought him into the world healthy, bright, and beautiful. So I guess while that feels like a choice, was it really? Victor was placed on my heart, no getting around it. The Lord put him there, and would not cease until I payed attention. That felt a little more like a direction, and a test in obedience. We have these two rescue dogs Duke and Murphy. They are both blessings, and we love them, but having two dogs, especially one with crazy anxiety issues and the strength and jumping ability of Superman, is not always easy. Try taking a vacation, Ha! We can't even all fit in our van!
Ok, I say all of that to say that life is full, life is filled with a billion little details every week, but I am waking up at night with God telling me to STOP, BREATH, ENJOY, PAY ATTENTION, TAKE TIME. Last night he spoke to me through Helen, my MomMom. Please don't think I am crazy, but I can still feel her presence in my dreams, and I do believe she talks to me. Not crazy swear, I am not having conversations with her when I am awake, it is just in dreams. I have always had dreams like that. When I was a teenager used to dream in detail, of a house I had never seen, only to find out it was my Great-Great Grandparents home, long story, weird yes, but true. My MomMom was chiding me for getting so caught up in my day to day, that I am missing the opportunity to BE with people who are important to me, to DO things that I have always wanted to DO.
Our Parents, our aging Aunts and Uncles, our extended families, old friends. Life is short. This earthly journey is such a gift, we just forget sometimes as we are hurdling through the roadblocks and dividing and conquering the schedule to stop, to make time, to listen, to enjoy. I am challenging myself to make time for those people while I still am blessed to have them. It will be hard. Logistics, schedules, time, money, these things all will stand in my way. MomMom Helen told me, to knock those barriers down like I do anything else that stands in the way of joy, and to make it happen.
Ok, I say all of that to say that life is full, life is filled with a billion little details every week, but I am waking up at night with God telling me to STOP, BREATH, ENJOY, PAY ATTENTION, TAKE TIME. Last night he spoke to me through Helen, my MomMom. Please don't think I am crazy, but I can still feel her presence in my dreams, and I do believe she talks to me. Not crazy swear, I am not having conversations with her when I am awake, it is just in dreams. I have always had dreams like that. When I was a teenager used to dream in detail, of a house I had never seen, only to find out it was my Great-Great Grandparents home, long story, weird yes, but true. My MomMom was chiding me for getting so caught up in my day to day, that I am missing the opportunity to BE with people who are important to me, to DO things that I have always wanted to DO.
Our Parents, our aging Aunts and Uncles, our extended families, old friends. Life is short. This earthly journey is such a gift, we just forget sometimes as we are hurdling through the roadblocks and dividing and conquering the schedule to stop, to make time, to listen, to enjoy. I am challenging myself to make time for those people while I still am blessed to have them. It will be hard. Logistics, schedules, time, money, these things all will stand in my way. MomMom Helen told me, to knock those barriers down like I do anything else that stands in the way of joy, and to make it happen.
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