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Let it go

I don't know about you, but for me, life is full of starts and stops.  My mind gets very targeted on a particular thing, and I am very focused, but I have difficulty maintaining that level of focus. Is this a form of Adult ADD?  There are many important things going on in life.  I can multi-task, in fact, I do this to a fault.  Finishing one thing well before moving on to the next is an area in which I am very weak.

I probably shouldn't share this, it is pretty personal.  It just occurred to me that there are likely others facing the same challenge.  In true Victoria style, I will throw myself out there-- so that you know you are not alone in your imperfection, lol.

Women are in the position of playing multiple roles at all times.

- Caretakers
- Income earners
- Empathizer & friend
- Lover
- Disciplinarian
- Volunteer
- Chef
- Housekeeper
- Clothing purchasing and management
- Loving and attentive parent
- Tutor

The list continues, but I will stop there.  It can be a heavy burden trying to be everything, to everyone. We often fall down on some of those roles. I know I do at least.  I can't do it on my own. I need to lean hard into my faith.  I need to turn over my burdens daily (or hourly some days).  I need to be gentle with myself. I am not good at all of those things naturally.  I don't like doing what is required in all of those roles.  Some of those jobs weigh heavy, and make me feel bad about myself.  I am a crummy housekeeper. I love a clean house, but I am terrible at keeping it that way.  I get really frustrated at homework time, particularly with my special needs guy.  There are more examples, but I will keep them to myself, :)

The only way to stay focused for me is to forget about being perfect.  I have to surrender to the fact that at some things, I suck.  I need to pray each day for the strength to be the best me I can be.  To stay focused on the things that will be most helpful to my family, and will most glorify my Lord.  To let go of the things that do not do that.  To seek guidance each day, to not run on my own--- chasing after what ever is obsessing me this week.

Sounds like a tall order.  I know at least in my case that freeing myself of the burden of being in charge of everything lightens the load a bit.  I can let go of a few worries today, and play with the kids. That is where I need to be, today.  Where are you today?

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