Thoughts on Motherhood

With Mother's Day comes the reminder that my life forever changed the day William Rhodes was born. It is a difficult thing to explain to a person who has never experienced it before, but the way you see the world morphed by the new lenses God puts before your eyes. I can't say it feels the same for everyone, for I can only speak for myself, but I will try to describe it.

Where once my focus was completely on my own life. My career, my relationship with Jeff, our home, our friends, our next vacation..... I now felt the pull of a higher responsibility. How will the choices I make today affect him, this precious, squalling, little bundle, of blue eyes, and chubby thighs. How will I ensure that he is provided for, and safe, and loved, always.

My own life, which I once took for granted and risked recklessly, seemed more important, as I existed for more than my own pleasure. Now I need to stay healthy, and safe, because this little one needs me. I am his protector, I am tasked with teaching him how to be a man, I must be here to love him and to make sure he knows what a valuable and precious person he is.

Sixteen years later, that feeling has only intensified. It has multiplied with the addition of each son into our family. I am a Momma bear, fierce, and unapologetic. I love these children in a way I never thought myself capable of.

Motherhood is certainly more than this, but of the many facets of this experience, this is the strongest for me. Thank you Lord for your wisdom, for trusting me with this role, for putting 5 beautiful boys in my care. I am so grateful for your provision, your wisdom, and your forgiveness, as I stumble along this journey.

Comments

The Sky is Blue

I want to thank all of you who lift my family up in prayer. I thank all of you who give us encouragement. I try really hard to see the cup 1/2 full, and most days I do. I was feeling a little down last night, but today is a new day. Blue skies remind me of how much I am loved. Have an awesome day friends. And.....on a side note.... Go Viewpoint Patriots!!! We are in the playoffs! Wooo Hoooooo!

Networking can be expensive!

I went to a cool women's networking meeting the other night. It was with an organization called Heartlink . It was at some one's house. An awesome dinner was served. Tables set, lovely hospitality, and about 20 very interesting women were there. We each got 3 minutes to introduce ourselves and tell a bit about our business's. Most of the women knew each other already. Many of the women present had business's that sell through direct marketing. Most of the big ones were represented, and a few new ones I had never heard of but found interesting. There were also women with other business's like insurance, legal services, printing, etc... It is great to meet like minded people, and I can definitely see the benefits of attending regularly. The bad part however, is it leaves you wanting to go shopping! All of a sudden, I MUST have the new mango cutter from Pampered Chef, and I am yearning to freshen up my candles, and I NEED a hole new wardrobe from CABi . ...

Believing isn't so hard

Why do I believe what I can't see? That is a valid question. I get it from well intentioned people just trying to understand our differences I guess. I'll try to answer as best as I can. The college years especially, are a time of exploration. We think in a less inhibited way. We behave in a less inhibited way. We ponder, and process, and get emotional about issues we think are important. It is definitely an important step in the process of maturing. I too, explored, pondered, got emotional, and was uninhibited. I remember especially being passionate about the right to a woman's choice. I never took the idea of abortion lightly. I held the hands of a few friends along the way, as they made that very difficult choice. I praise God that I was never faced with that decision, I am not sure what I would have done at that stage of my life. I would like to think I would have chosen life, but I can't say for sure. I don't believe that ab...

The Sky is Blue

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