I am an impulsive woman, no doubt about that. I have learned over the years to slow myself down, a little at least. I try to think on something, to detail lists of pro's & con's, to run it past my husband, to seek council from wise friends, to pray. Notice I mentioned pray last. I list it last because I would be lying if I didn't confess that I run far, far, ahead of God on most decisions. I have been living under the misconception that I know what is best for me, that I am a smart woman, that I can trust my gut, that I don't need God to intercede in my decision making process. The problem is, that last part, the part where I decide if God intercedes or not... yeah, well, it doesn't work that way. God does as God will. He decides what will work in my life, and what will not. If my chosen path is wrong, it will work, or it won't, but I am not the one who decides which way things will go. Sooooo, it doesn't much matter how possible or impossible something seems. I need to pray for God's will to be done, to let him know I am open to what he would have for me, and to prepare myself for what will be. I have been recently a little frustrated by my inability to move forward on job opportunities. Jeff and I had decided that my going back to work in the Fall would be a good idea, opportunities seemed to appear from no where, and now I am waiting for movement (very impatiently). It is frustrating, but that is why I write this. I am trying to remind myself how very important it is to be open to what God has planned for me, even if it looks very different than what I would imagine for myself. His plan is always greater.
I am helping to prepare a baby shower for a young woman at our church. She is young, just 22. Thinking about her, and what the future may hold for her and her little family, got me to thinking about life at 22. Much has changed for me since I was 22. That was really a difficult time. I didn't realize at the time that it was difficult. I had graduated from college, was having a post college, pre-real life, super good time. I was bar tending, partying, picking up and traveling to far away places to party some more. I didn't really have much in the way of financial responsibility yet, and my parents were living in Egypt-- leaving me in charge of the house and my younger sister. It was an "out all night, sleep all day", kind of life. To be honest, I was setting a pretty poor example for my sister, who at the time was working full-time at a nursing home, and was far more responsible than I was. Looking back at that time, and even later, till about age 25, it make...
Comments
Post a Comment