The Sky is Blue

Summer is a wonderful time if you have the luxury to stay home with your kids and enjoy the slower pace.  Lazy days, pool time, reading, outings, and spending time at the beach is good for the soul.  If you are a parent who keeps your kids home with you vs. sending them to camp--- there is also a dark side to the lazy days of Summer. I know many Moms who say loud and proud, "I can't wait till Summer!! Oh yeah! Only 3 more weeks!!, Oh no! It's over already! We need a few more weeks!!" Are you one of those? Do you say it with a straight face? Ok, maybe you are sincere.  Bully for you, you win the Mom medal. Those are NOT my people.  I love my kids, don't get me wrong, I really do.  I love reading time, and lego time, and swimming, and picnics at the beach-- as much as any other Mom.  Let's get real for a minute though.  We can't play down the other side of life with kids. The constant fighting The whining The meltdowns (yes one of our guys st...

I don't know about you, but for me, life is full of starts and stops.  My mind gets very targeted on a particular thing, and I am very focused, but I have difficulty maintaining that level of focus. Is this a form of Adult ADD?  There are many important things going on in life.  I can multi-task, in fact, I do this to a fault.  Finishing one thing well before moving on to the next is an area in which I am very weak. I probably shouldn't share this, it is pretty personal.  It just occurred to me that there are likely others facing the same challenge.  In true Victoria style, I will throw myself out there-- so that you know you are not alone in your imperfection, lol. Women are in the position of playing multiple roles at all times. - Caretakers - Income earners - Empathizer & friend - Lover - Disciplinarian - Volunteer - Chef - Housekeeper - Clothing purchasing and management - Loving and attentive parent - Tutor The list continues, but...

Blessings are overflowing around here, and I am both proud and hugely grateful.  Two of my sons leave for College in the Fall. They have both earned scholarships and will be College Athletes.  We could not be more proud of their efforts both in the classroom and on the field.  We have so many people to thank for this. First and foremost, our Father, who art in Heaven--- he led us every step of the way.  Opening doors, putting amazing people in our path, answering prayers.... He has been faithful, always. Dwayne Walker, family friend, and one of Jack's youth football coaches. He introduced us to Viewpoint School, which has been an incredible blessing. Chris Adamson, family friend, Head Football Coach at Viewpoint, and overall mentor and counselor. He has Coached both of our boys, been an incredible example of ethics, and responsible behavior. Over the years Chris has answered every text, email, and phone call that we ever made to him--- responding with hel...

How do you know when you are getting too detached? How do you know when your dependence on God has morphed into a routine, self-reliant life?  It is very easy for this to happen.  The world is designed with a myriad of distractions to pull you away from what is truly necessary in your life, and into the world with all of it's shiny things. It is very easy to gently and quietly slip into this state of self-reliance when things are good.  If everyone is healthy, the ship isn't sinking, the job is good, and in general life seems peachy-- who needs God? Uh, oh.....that kind of apathy sounds a little like an unintentional prayer for God to bring you to your knees. Most people feel closest to God when they are at their weakest. When we know that it is only through him that we can be at peace with our circumstances, we seek him.  We look see his love for us in the little things.  He is not a magician God that is here to entertain us with wonders, but it is through th...

Our lifestyle isn't easy for everyone to understand.  Big families befuddle most people. Comments like.... Whoa! You sure have your hands full..... You know how babies are made, right??...... You sure you know what you are getting yourselves in to?--- these comments and more are showered on us daily.  Oh, and let us not forget the classic,  Five boys! Why didn't you adopt a girl??   We don't expect others to understand.  Everyone chooses their own path. We are not martyrs, we are not trying to save the world.  We are told by well meaning friends and family daily, that we "can't save the world." We know that. I guess what is hard for us to understand is....why is it so hard to understand why we would do SOMETHING?  Just because you can't fix the planet by yourself, doesn't mean you shouldn't use less water, or recycle, right?  Just because I can't save every kid from a rotten life, doesn't mean I shouldn't do everything I can for these...

There are different kinds of women in the world.  Those who pamper themselves, don designer labels, spend hundreds of dollars on a pair of shoes, and who don't think twice about the cost of their facial products.  I know some of those women, God bless them. Then their are those who never do anything for themselves.  They don't take care of their nails or hair. They neglect their health, their wardrobes, their skin, and never bother with little extras.  I know some of those women too, God bless them.  Somewhere in between are the rest of us. Perhaps we splurge on occasion.  We also don't bother sometimes.  Maybe we get our nails done, but color our own hair.  Maybe we have way to many shoes, but shop for clothes at Target.  I am one of these women. I know plenty of these women, God bless them. Taking care of yourself is important. Paying attention to your health is important. Nurturing your skin and body does not have to be an exer...

Yet another landmark in the life of Rhodes has occurred.  We watched our second son, Jack, graduate from High School.  This week we will watch our third son graduated from Middle School.  Three of our babies, and I use that term very loosely-- as they are all over 200 lbs and over 6ft tall, are growing into men.  My heart pitter patters at the thought of my two oldest, out of my sight, living their own lives, making choices without checking in--- wait I almost just threw up.  Yes, that is how I am feeling. Proud, excited, terrified, and sick to my stomach.  Strange mix of emotions and feelings, I realize.  I cannot be the first parent to be both excited and sick at the prospect of babies moving thousands of miles away. Right? So two of our angels are flying from the nest.  We won't exactly be empty nesters, we will still have three at home.  I guess in a way we have it easier than many who go straight to the empty nest stage of life. ...

I was a teenager in the 80's.  We were living in Southern Pennsylvania, where the Winter's were cold & icy, and the Summer's were hot and sweaty.  The first hint of warm weather signaled us to bring our the shorts, and baby oil. We were all about getting our tan on.  You either used one of those coconut smelling tanning concoctions, or if you were hard core (like me, and my girls) you used Grandma Helen's formula, baby oil and iodine.  We would slather that oily mess on from head to toe, squeeze lemons onto our hair (or later sprayed Sun-In all over it), grab the cordless phone, our favorite nail polish, and head out to the pool. Now as a parent, and adult, my first thought is "oh no! don't get all of that crap in the pool!". My parents tried, believe me.  My sister and I would still get right in, get on the float and get our tan on. You couldn't lay on the side see.  You need the water to reflect and make sure you got the ultimate amount of sun...

One of the many joys of after 40 life in my experience has been lash thinning. My once luxurious, black, batting, eyelashes, are now lighter in color, and very sparse. Darn aging crap. I comfort myself with the idea that all of the wisdom I have obtained all of these years is beginning to crowd out my beauty juju--- and oh, I do want to be wise. So like any strong woman, I adapt. There are products that can help.  I have tried Latisse with good results.  It does have a few downsides-- price, requires discipline, you must follow the directions to get results-- so for the rebels among us it is a waste of money. I have also heard good things about some of the other serums out there, though I have never tried them personally.  I have many a recipe for DIY serums and mascara formulas involving coconut oil and charcoal, but let's be honest-- ain't nobody got time for that. But, low and behold, I have found a product that gives me long luscious looking lashes, in m...

Ok friends, let's talk about red lips. I can't tell you how many people have told me over the years-- "I just can't wear red."  Au contrarie mon Amie-- yes you can. Red is the most beautiful, classic lip a girl can wear. It is grown-up make-up. Red says, "I like who I am." Getting the shade, the finish and the texture right can be tricky-- those choices are very personal. You have to consider you skin tone, the way you wear your lipstick, are you a smoocher, how often will you reapply? Let's start with shade. I found this helpful graphic to help you determine which shade will be most complimentary. Once you have determined which red is right, it is time to consider wear. I love a classic blue/red lipstick with a matte finish, but I am a smoocher. Blue/reds also have the added benefit of making your teeth look whiter. I get very grossed out by lipstick goo on cups and straws,  so personally I opt for a long wear lip color like Revlo...

If you are a Mother, you worry. It is part of the gig. It doesn't matter if your child is 2 or 52, you worry. Are they safe? Are they working hard enough in school? Are they healthy? Will they make good choices? Are you screwing them up? Will they make something of themselves? Will they be good human beings? Have the morals and beliefs you have tried to instill in them stick with them? It is tough, and makes for many a sleepless night.  As a mother of teens, I can't tell you how many times I have bolted out of bed panicked because one of my boys wasn't home yet after a night out. With 5 kids, I cannot imagine the worry will lessen over time. Ha! It will only get worse. I have tools, mainly prayer, that keep the worry in check. One thing you cannot get around though is how worry mucks with your face!! That "11" wrinkle between my eyes really gets on my nerves. The bags under my eyes really tick me off.  Kids give you wrinkles, it is a proven fact! I ...

If ever there were a person who was less afraid of change than I am-- I have yet to meet them.  In fact, I would call myself a "change seeker", a habitual "cliff jumper".  That mentality comes with many a flaw: It makes it difficult for me to stick to a boring, or stressful task. It makes it very difficult for me to defer to the authority of others, I am not sure why that is, it is a rule breaker mentality I suppose. I have trouble with "negative nellie's", or those who must always play "devil's advocate." My brain says YES before it fully processes information. While all of those flaws must seem horrifying to the average person, me not so much. Not being an over analyzer frees me from many a burden: I don't have to know the outcome before leaping, so it opens me up to success.  It opens me up to failure too, no doubt, but I can process failure and move on better than most people. I don't freak out when inevitable ...

In a recent discussion with my sis, we delved into the differences between us-- primarily the introvert vs. extrovert difference. That inherent difference colors our views of most every situation and choice. I had no idea until that discussion how very differently we can view the very same thing. In fact, despite how it may appear to others, I really don't feel like an extrovert. I find small talk really challenging, I need alone time to recharge, time among large groups of people is exhausting. But I guess the difference is that I don't prioritize my alone time above interaction, I go to the event and socialize knowing I will be exhausted after. I guess I am a hybrid intro/extrovert. It takes a toll though. My drive to be doing "something" all of the time is difficult for some of my loved ones to understand. I am always creating something, starting a business, volunteering, supporting a cause-- it may seem a little crazy to you. I don't know what drives this, but...

Now 48, I am painfully aware of the skin changes that come with each passing year. Always one to be complexion concious, I have tried to keep good products on my skin to keep it youthful looking-- but now more than ever,  keeping up with the pace of change is a challenge.  There are billions of products out there promising youthful results.  Having tried many of them, without good results, the next step for me was all natural rememdies.  Becoming a home chemist, I broke out the essential oils and enriching base oils like coconut, olive, and almond oil, and gave them a go.  The results have been delightful.  I have come up with incredible body scrubs, salves, headache helpers, toothpaste, deoderant.... great products that are incredible for everyday use--- but alas my face, (and hands) keep aging. So I invested in new cosmetiques.  A friend  is selling Younique, and everyone is raving about it.  The products come beautifully packaged, and in...