I have been working on cultivating a spirit of positivity. A "yes, of course!" mindset. I know a lot of books have been written on the topic of saying "NO", creating boundaries for yourself, respecting your limits, all that stuff, but have you ever thought of how you could improve your life, and the life of others by saying "Sure!"? It is not always easy, in fact it can be really hard. When your child looks at you at 9:30pm and says, "Mom can you sew my jockstrap tonight, it broke today at practice"--- meanwhile he has been home since 5:30, ate dinner, did homework, played a bit of video games, and it didn't come up until I was completely relaxed. Of course my gut reaction is to rant about how inconsiderate it is, and yes, I have been guilty of that rant more than once. What I aspire to do however, is to say, "sure honey" kiss him on the cheek goodnight, then remind him in the morning that it would be helpful to me if he presented me with these needs earlier in the evening. When a friend needs help, maybe their child needs a ride, maybe they don't feel well and are in need of a break, these things don't always happen when our schedule is wide open-- sometimes we have to put aside the busyness of our schedule and say "sure honey, I'd be happy to help, just let me know what I can do." "No" comes easier and faster on my tongue, followed by a list of reasons why I am too busy, or to tired to help (my sons, my husband, my sister....etc...), but I don't like the way it sounds coming out of my mouth. I don't like the way it makes other people feel. So, I made a choice a while back to say "Yes, of course", way more often than I say "No". I like who I am WAY better as a woman who helps. :)
I enter this new week a little tired, but smiling. Why? No drama this weekend. We had sunshine, and sports, and cuddle time--- less the drama. Most families don't experience the intense level of emotions that the Rhodes clan does. Sure, they have the hectic life of families, perhaps some fighting, the normal mess--- perhaps a little teen hormone induced drama....but we have drama of a different kind in our house. The kind of drama caused by a brain that is shooting off crazy chemicals induced by years of trauma. When our son Victor is home, the whole world is a great big land mine. Saying the wrong thing, calling him out on behavior, or even suggesting that he not eat a 4th serving of ice cream can cause the the peace to recede, and for chaos to ensue. He is now in a boarding school for kids with emotional issues. As sad as it is that our family isn't all together--- I must admit that the peace in our household is a welcome blessing. We are learning more and more
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