The Sky is Blue

What a lovely Memorial Day Weekend! Gorgeous weather here, sunny & cool. All of the kids had a ball swimming, even my husband got in the pool, and that doesn't happen often. Jeff and the kids slept out in the tent (in the back yard). I got to catch up with my College roommate. We cooked out, had friends over. It was super relaxing. I understand it was seriously hot on the East Coast, looks like Summer is coming all at once for you all. I am a little bummed that we have to get back to our normal routine tomorrow morning. Jeff and I told the kids this weekend that we may have to move. The owners of our home have decided to put the house on the market, and while they are offering us first option to buy, we are not in the position to do so. I am still praying for a miracle. I know there are other homes out there, but I really love this one. I am praying that God opens a door wide, that will make the circumstances bend in miraculous ways, to enable us to either buy this h...

If you ran in to me today, you might have noticed a chink in the armor. I had a rough day. It was the kind of day that I would normally stay home, and keep my cards close to the vest. No staying home for me though. It was Open House night at my 4 th graders school. I went to the open house. I smiled, I said hello to friends and acquaintances , but I wasn't myself, and I believe it showed. I'm sorry if any of my grouchy, bummer day, spilled out. I really try to keep a positive attitude despite what may be going on, but today I just didn't have it in me. The Open house was lovely though. The Art Show looked great. My son's classroom (Mrs. Smith, 4 th grade) looked amazing. It was great to see those faces I only see at school events. Christy and I took the boys to Menchie's after, for a great big yogurt, in the beautiful Calabasas Commons. All is good in the world, and I am blessed.

I cannot believe how fast this year has gone by. My oldest only has one more week of school left, and the others are not far behind him. I enjoy summer, but I'm not quite mentally prepared for it. Good bye quiet days. I really need to get planning. My hope is that I'll be doing some contract writing this summer, so it will be even more important for me to keep these boys busy. I have to gear up for a fall where I have four children in four different schools. The simple logistics of getting everyone where they need to be on time is a little much to figure out. One school on one end of Calabasas , one school on the far highlands side of Calabasas , one down the street, and one in Woodland Hills. They all pretty much start and end at the same time, so short of cloning myself, I'm not sure how I will swing it. I have confidence it will all work out though. I'm going to miss having Nick at home. He is my last baby, and he is headed off to Kindergarten, :(. I have ...

I remember my father telling me once that "You'll be a conservative, when you have something to conserve". He was right. I have to tell you friends (and I know many of you fall on the more liberal side of the fence), that age, parenthood, and faith, have definitely influenced how I feel about things. I'm sure you saw that article about the family who has not disclosed the sex of their baby, even to close family members. They want to ensure that he/she can assume any identity they please, and won't be bound by social /gender expectations etc.... So does that mean, if the child decides being a puppy would be more fun, they can just decide to be a puppy? Are we humans so powerful that we should just decide that our will is more important than our Creators design? It just seems completely whack to me, so arrogant. I am all for not limiting yourself, for reaching for the stars, being the best that you can be--But, I am floored by the arrogance of those who b...

I need a little help here. If you have wisdom to lend , please email me. Ok , I have two dogs. Duke, a black lab/ sharpei mix, about 5 years old. He was a rescue, had a few issues, but has a great temperament , and is a great pet. Murphy, also a rescue, but a puppy, around 1 we think. He is an attention hog. He chews everything. He digs. He has now progressed from chewing Nick's toys, to trying to chew shoes. He chews cables of any kind (we have lost countless DS chargers, phone cords, etc...). He scares the pee out of the Gardner's , and any other service person who comes near our yard. Having said all of that, Murphy is sweet and affectionate, and super cute. We love him, we just don't know how to do the puppy thing I guess. My oldest son is reading dog training websites, and is working with him a little bit each day. My husband, who is not a huge dog fan, but has really grown to love Duke, is getting a bit irritated by the naughty puppy behavior from Mur...

Alright, I must ask...who among us is guilty of being less diligent about taking pictures and getting them into albums with our younger children, than we were with the older ones???? Admit it. Is your youngest resigned to viewing their childhood on jpeg files? I am ashamed to say, poor Nick see's his childhood mostly on Daddy's phone, or on facebook albums. :( Now some of you may not think that is a big deal, but I must point out that technology is constantly changing. Those files, so easy to enjoy now may not be as accessible to you 20 years from now (unless you are super diligent about backing things up, changing formats, etc... are you?) If you have been to my home, you know that I have been a dedicated scrapbooker since about 1996 (the year my oldest was born). My shelves are full of completed albums, close to 60 I believe. In the beginning I really enjoyed doing it. It was fantastic social time. I would hang out with my girlfriends, we would drink wine, tell stor...

How is it, that life can be filled with so many possibilities, and so many impossible choices at the same time? I am a content woman. Life is good. It just seems that with every blessing comes a difficult circumstance or challenge to overcome. Every time I am AMAZED at a blessing, it seems to be followed with a sacrifice??? Is that just how life works? I'll share with you something personal, that will help you to understand my state of mind. We sold our home back east, and invested most everything we had in this move (to Los Angeles), in Jeff's business. I have no regrets about that. I gave up a lucrative career in order to stay home to raise my sons. Again, no regrets. Those decisions had consequences. As a result of choices we made, we are now in the position where leasing our home is our only option. The owners of our home, would like to sell, and cash out. I have made a home for my family no matter where we are, but we have become very happy and comfortable i...

Having been around lot's of little girls lately, it is clear to me that God knew what he was doing when he gave me boys. I love little girls. I love their sweetness, their cuteness, the way they mimic grown ups, it is all very sweet. I don't think however, that I would be an especially nurturing Mama to a little girl. My parenting style while very affectionate, is also very, no-nonsense, "get over yourself", and take those tears out of here fast. I have been gifted with a very low tolerance for whining, and (unless there is injury or blood, even then, I can be a little tough) tears drive me crazy. Now that is funny coming from a woman, who can be quite whiny, and very tearful (hormones I tell ya, hormones). Tattle tale behavior sends me reeling, and ends up getting everyone punished. I don't freak out and run to the field/rink/mat when one of my boys gets jostled or hurt during the game/match. I don't panic over blood. I feel confident that my bo...

How do you handle change? Does it stress you out? Does it make you lose sleep, or get stomach aches?? I can handle change ok , once I am sure what the change is going to be. Where I have trouble is, "limbo land". Not knowing how things will work out, not being sure what the change will look like, stresses me out beyond belief. It often seems that changes happen in bunches for me. Never one thing at a time. So now I have a few of our "changes" settled, and whooooop , out of no where drops a big one, that impacts all of the other things I thought were all settled. Now how do I handle that one??? Well I already have a stomach ache, and I can feel the stress building. Of course, I feel like this is a test of my faith. Can I let go of the stress and trust that God will see us through, and that it will all work out as it should? He has proven to me over and over that he cares and will intervene on our behalf if I am faithful and prayerful. His solution isn'...

Wow, we have had rain here in SoCal two days in a row. It is kind of cool. The kids love when it rains. Rain brings with it a certain permission to slow down a little. We don't get it often, so when we do I relish in the dark clouds, and the pitter patter on the roof. I enjoy my morning coffee cuddled up on the couch with a good book. I love the way the rose bushes look after a good rain too. Unfortunately today is not a day that I can just chill like I would love to. There are school drop off's & pick ups, wrestling practices, band concerts, chores, all of my normal stuff that still needs to get done. But I will approach it all with an easy going, rainy day attitude today. Enjoy!

Most people get a shiver down their spines when you mention that Friday the 13th is coming up. They imagine scary movies, a day full of trips & falls, bad news, etc. The number 13 is my lucky number and Friday the 13th has always been a day of good fortune for me. This past Friday was no exception, hey I even won a prize in the Mega Millions drawing on Friday, it was only $7, but a win is a win! It is strange how this number has reoccurred in my life over and over. Both my sister and I were born on the 13th. My closest childhood friend Stacey Hasener, was also born on the 13th. My first real boyfriend was born on the 13th, that was Doug Fritz. My first love, Jody Hauck, was also born on the 13th, and most importantly, I met my husband (the love of my life) on Friday the 13th. How cool is that. I'll never forget talking to my Mom on the phone, on Friday March 13th, 1992, she said," hey you should go to happy hour today after work, it is the 13th you know, you might...

So my husband left for Detroit on business, and here I am with our four (of my own) kids, one cousin, and one teenage friend. Video games, little brother torture, and food scavenging abound. Boys like nothing better than to eat, shoot things, and wrestle around narrowly missing lamps, etc... Good times. I actually have some writing (not blogging, but technical writing) to get done tonight, and I am trying to figure out how I am going to create an oasis of concentration and peace in this crazy house. Some ideas.... -- gag them all and put them in a closet..... just kidding. -- put on head phones, listen to music and try to block them out. -- go to someone else's house to write, leaving them to fend for themselves. -- write in the middle of the night when they are all peacefully snoozing. So many options, and all soooo attractive. I'll figure it out, always do. Have a great Sunday night!

Life is such a whirlwind. It seems that things always happen in droughts or monsoons in my family. I am so pleased that so many good things are happening. Spring is a season of renewal, and so many new things are blooming here in the Rhodes clan. Nick is headed to kindergarten, Jack is off to high school, William is wrapping up a great first year of high school, and Michael will be in 5 th grade! My husband is working hard, and seeing fruit both at work and in creative endeavours . I have some good work opportunities on the horizon. It seems we walked down a path, and God is blessing it. When I pray for God to open doors that will lead us in his will, and slam shut those that are not in his will, he delivers. Optimism is surging, and it feels good. I much prefer living on an optimistic high, than sporting a stress and worry filled outlook. I know that all good things come with associated action items and potential stressors , but I'll take it over anxiety any day of th...

While my goal with each new day is to approach my tasks with sunshine and light, I am not always successful. Some days, the burdens of life feel heavy. Stress threatens to take over. Worry about things I cannot control threatens to overwhelm me. Every woman struggles with days like this I think. Most days I can get a grip on things through prayer. I lean on my Lord, knowing he has a plan for me, and he wants to prosper me, not harm me. Today in all honesty, I am feeling weak. I will acknowledge that while I am under a lot of pressure, it likely feels a little bigger and heavier today because of hormones. Being a woman is extra challenging because of our monthly gift of humility (cramps, headaches, blues, all that loveliness). I won't do what I feel like doing today. (laying on the couch watching TV , weeping over commercials, eating junk) I will spend some time in the Word, take a shower, crank up some music, and tackle some household chores. I will play with my toddle...

Having just celebrated Mother's Day, it just started me thinking about how fortunate I was to have a Mom. I have a Mother who was always there for me, always provided for me (with help from Dad of course), saw to it that I got a good education, and who to this day, loves and supports me. It is easy to take that for granted if you have always had a mother you could count on. My youngest son is adopted. We adopted him from the Foster Care system here in Los Angeles. People often ask me what made us decide to adopt, we had three healthy boys already. Jeff and I have always had a heart for the lost ones. The ones who might otherwise be bounced around, and raised in the system. We were so fortunate when we got Nicholas. He was healthy, and thankfully he has been in the care of our family since he was 2 days old, so he never met the future he might have had. He had the protective arms of a Mother by day two, Praise God for that. Many kids are not as lucky as Nicholas. Many kids ...

What a nice weekend. As hectic as it can be maneuvering through the social & sports schedule of a family of six, I wouldn't want it any other way. I never imagined myself to be sitting on the sidelines cheering on my boys in brutal hand to hand combat (wrestling), watching them struggle and bleed (nose bleeds). I am so proud of all of them. We are coming up on football season, I know, ALREADY??? I only have one playing this year, and he is in High school, so believe it or not, that will make it a little easier on the Mom chauffeur. As busy as these crazy days are, I know there will be a day when I will long for the days when our Saturdays were booked from 7am-7pm. I know I will miss all of it. My two oldest sons are becoming men right before my eyes. In a few short years William will be off to college, with Jack right behind him the following year. Sigh........ Fortunately for me, God knows my heart, and brought Nick & Michael to me, so that I have many years left ...

Happy Mother's Day friends. I have no crystal ball to tell me how your day is going, but I hope you have a lovely day. I hope you look around, and breathe in the smell of your "babies", and smile a smile of incredible gratitude. Whether you are treated like a Queen today, or whether life swirls about you like any other day, I pray you are filled with joy. Give thanks for all of those who cherish you. Give everyone kisses. Give hugs with abandon. Smile, knowing that your love and presence is so very meaningful in their lives. You are more important to them than you know, or than they could ever express. They are grateful for you. Have a beautiful and blessed day.

I know I write about my children a lot. I hope it doesn't bore you to tears. If so, feel free to skip reading today. In my defense, I originally started this blog as a book. My intention being to document my love for my family, the joys and tears of parenthood, to communicate to my husband and sons how important I have found it to develop a personal relationship with God. Along the road I know I have detailed life with my beautiful toddler Nick. I have detailed my amazing love for my oldest William. I know I have discussed my special soul, who marches to his own groove, Michael. I do not think that I have given you a snapshot of my incredible, 2 nd son Jack. I always thought birth order didn't mean a lot, but I believe there is something to all of that first born, second born, middle child research. Jack is proof positive. He was always the sweetest, and most obedient of my children. The boy who won over the hearts of adults. He has always been the one to push himsel...

I am thinking about reading, or re-reading a few books. The general topic area of these books, is nurturing a healthy marriage . It is easy to get into the habit of taking care of the kids, being busy, tag teaming kid commitments, and becoming passing ships. It is easy to forget that the kids came in to your lives ( marriage ), not the other way around. Men and women are so different. We show affection differently, nurture one another differently, and interpret our partners words through our own filters. We may think we are bending over backwards to take care of everyone (therefore showing our husbands love), and they may feel neglected and unloved at the same time. Small gestures of consideration, or words of respect may mean more to our husbands than 12 loads of washed laundry, and a weeks worth of kiddie chauffeur service. A few books that cover this topic are... Wife after God's own Heart by Elizabeth George The 5 love Languages by Gary Chapman The Husband Project by Kat...

I spoke to two very good friends today. I am so glad I took the time, set aside the chaos, and chatted for a while. I don't do that very often. It is hard for me to talk on the phone, the interruptions are endless, cell phone signals SUCK in my neighborhood, and I am often too tired to talk, sad, right? Well today, I am glad I did. When you live far from the friends who "went through the wars" with you, it is easy to lose track of their day to day lives. I thank God everyday for helping me stay connected to friends through texts, and Facebook , what amazing technology for staying at least a little connected in between the rare phone call. These friends are both going through troubling times in their lives. Very different circumstances, but both in need of encouragement just the same. How blessed am I that I was able to love on them a little today. What a gift to me, that I was able to listen to them, to pray for them, to encourage them today. Life takes over, and ...

Have you ever taken one of the those Personality tests at work, where they identify your work styles? Or maybe a test that would help you to figure out what your spiritual gifts are? There are several on- line, and a multitude of books on the topic. I have. The results were about what I expected. A few surprises of course. The real rub for me comes in when I look at how I am using those gifts, or not using them as it may be. Some times, I find that even though a need (at school, at my church, in a small group) falls into my area of gifting, I don't step up. On the flip side, sometimes I step up, and step up, and step up, until I am over scheduled and stressed out. Sound familiar? I think the key is, to look at opportunities to volunteer, in your community, or in a ministry, and really hone in on the ones that are congruent with your gifts. Look at where you could have the most impact. If you are doing work that is congruent with your gifting, it shouldn't feel stres...

I had a tough week last week. Physically a mess, it happens. I am on the other side now, feeling better, and able to see through the haze of pain and exhaustion. In hind sight I can see that I fell into a big pit of self pity, I blame the lack of sleep, in my defense I was really, really, tired. I noticed myself getting really irritated with my loved ones. I was feeling like no one really cared how I felt as long as I still took care of everything. Crummy way to feel, let me tell you. I ended up going to the ER Friday, because I needed some relief and my Dr. wouldn't see me for a week. I spent the entire day sitting around doing absolutely nothing. As miserable as it was, it gave me time to think in relative quiet (except for the mental patient screaming in the room next to me). I ran through a lesson in my head, that I need to be re-taught over and over again it seems. No matter how you feel, always try to give others your absolute best. Your kindest, most patient, most...